Six purposes of dating
The conversation should not mainly be about the issue of history, but of maturity.
If this topic has been especially painful or difficult for you, it might be helpful to commit to refrain from speaking about it except with an older couple or in premarital counseling.The sustaining benefit of sex in marriage is not the orgasm, but the committed intimate relationship.Don’t buy into the temptation to dwell on the ways you are deficient — the temptation to self-destruct.There’s not a magic number of weeks or months to wait before dating someone else after having sex. “Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way” (Proverbs 19:2).Andy Stanley recommends Christians who have lapsed into a sexually immoral lifestyle wait a full year before dating again — he says, in fact, that it is the best and most important piece of advice he can give those in this situation. As you consider someone for marriage, their maturity today — the evidence and trajectory of their becoming more like Christ — should be your primary concern.